Oriada

China is getting creative, according to the World Intellectual Property Organization, which revealed today that patent applications from the Middle Kingdom doubled between 2000 and 2004.  But those who fear change needn’t worry.  The Chongqing Municipal Government has taken steps to ensure that all this creativity business doesn’t get out of hand.

Authorities in the megalopolis announced yesterday that hefty fines would be slapped on those involved in online misbehaviour or net-hijinx of any sort.  Officially the new rules are aimed at those "who spread information or remarks defaming others, launch personal attacks or damage others’ reputations online".  Chongqing’s netizens are also reminded to eat their greens and not to run with scissors in their hands.  But the declaration also takes a pointed swipe at Egao, the peculiarly Chinese phenomenon of satiric online videos.  Chongqing authorities promise fines of up to 5000 yuan for those who produce online videos that "satirize others or social phenomena".

How they plan to enforce this is anyone’s guess. But then all things internet, and egao in particular, do tend to attract some of the wackier rulings.  (Like the time authorities tried - but failed - to regulate how much time people spent playing online games. Or the more recent declaration that all online videos had to be registered before being posted.)

==YOUR 30 SECOND EGAO CRASH COURSE==

What is this Egao you speak of?

A phenomenon centred around spoof videos and photoshopped images that has blossomed on the internet in China over the last year or so.  China Daily describes it as "a popular subculture that deconstructs serious themes to entertain people with comedy effects". And if this description is good enough for China Daily, it’s good enough for me.

Sounds like my kind of scene. I want in! Where can I buy?

Steady on there. It’s not available in the shops. At least not until some local ‘entrepeneur’ realises there’s money to be made in it and employs a team of migrant workers from Henan to pump out Egao ripoffs day and night. For the real deal, though, you need to get to one of China’s many video sharing websites, like Tudou.com, Uume.com or Yoqoo.com.   Among the most popular videos on any of these sites, you’re bound to find a few egao classics, along with clips of cavorting bikini babes and limitless quantities of "cutesy" flash animations based around Chinese popsongs.  Many of the most popular vids have also migrated to Youtube.   

Why are the authorities getting so hot and bothered about it?  Internet videos are wholesome, harmless fun, aren’t they?  Well, I mean apart from all that porn and snuff movies and whatnot.

Well no, it’s not all harmless fun, as far as the Chinese authorities are concerned. Or at least not when it involves them directly.  Poking fun at the leaders, or at any of the pantheon of revolutionary icons - like boy-warrior Pan Dongzi (see below) or whiter-than-white orphan Lei Feng - is strictly verboten.  A cartoonist for Guangzhou’s XKB newspaper was suspended last month for drawing this not-exactly-biting caricature of Chinese president Hu Jintao.  

 

The cartoon shows Hu crying while writing a letter.  And it was used to illustrate a true story about Hu writing a letter…and crying while doing so.  We are not talking Swiftean levels of satire here.

So successful have the authorities been in stifling satire that Chinese writer Yan Lianke this week revealed that he self-censors his writing so that it won’t get banned by the official censors.  He also admitted "My greatest worry is that self-censorship has drained my passion and dulled my sharpness."

So, it must be something of a shock for the authorities to watch the ever-growing popularity of this less-than-reverential artform.  And, just like everyone’s favourite pouting fat kid, Egao idol Xiapang,  the fact that the authorities are so very humourless makes them ripe targets for spoofing. 

Everyone else is talking about Egao.  How can I join in without sounding like an ass ?

Rock on up to your nearest egao-related conversation, subtly namedrop at least 2 of these 3 Egao icons and you’re golden….

The Backdorm Boys:  Two students (plus occassional accomplices) from Guangdong province, who, instead of memorising words for the CET4, spend their free time directing and starring in amusing parodies of pop videos on a computer in their dorm. 

Hollywood Movie Equivalent: Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.  The Backdorm Boys’ brand of rubber-faced hilarity is not exactly original, but what they do, they do very well indeed.

Sparkling Red Star: The lampoonee here is a teenager named Pan Dongzi, the lead character in 70s propoganda "patriotic education" classic - Sparkling Red Star.  In the original, little Dongzi is so disgusted by the feudalistic behaviour of his landlord that he joins up with the Red Army, becomes a revolutionary and eventually exacts his bitter revenge on the bourgeoisie.  But in the 2006 version, instead of being a vicious, capitalist-baiting child-soldier, he is fulfilling his lifelong dream to win the Supergirls singing contest and get rich.  Not surprisingly, this video sparked an outcry that led to its director issuing a fulsome (in the original sense of the word) apology: “I didn’t expect an imprudent activity would cause such a serious result. I call for all netizens and Web sites not to spread or download the video any more, otherwise all the aftereffects have nothing to do with me.”

Hollywood Movie Equivalent: Last Tango in Paris.  Cleancut hero from decades yore returns….but this time he’s doing something dirty and corrupt…

The Bloody Incident of the Steamed Bun:  This 20 minute parody of the movie The Promise was Egao’s breakout hit, the one that brought the idea to the mainstream.  It became popular partly due to the wave of intensely negative reaction that greeted Chen Kaige’s overblown "epic", the most expensive (and most incomprehensible) Chinese film ever made.  Viewers distinctly unimpressed with the original 3 hour behemoth found this internet snippet a far more rewarding experience.

Hollywood Movie Equivalent: Citizen Kane.  No serious discussion about Egao is complete without namechecking this ‘classic’.  Plus, just as Hearst went after Orson Welles, the director of The Promise, pompous oaf Chen Kaige, attempted to sue the maker of the spoof for using clips from his pompous film without permission.  Apparently realising that this was making him look far more ridiculous than any 20 minute internet clip ever could, he eventually dropped the case.

Just over a month after Peking University kicked off an almighty ruckus by announcing that it would build a golf course/driving range on campus (as noted on this blog at the time), Xiamen University yesterday declared that it would go one better and force students from its business majors to learn how to play golf, whether they want to or not. 

The head of the University, Zhu Chongshi, announced yesterday that all students majoring in Management, Law, Economics and (for some bizarre reason) Software Engineering will be required to take to the fareways as part of their studies. "The highest embodiment of the education system is producing socially elite people with the best education," claims Mr. Zhu.

Inevitably, the move has been met with howls of derision from some quarters.  China Daily quotes the Chairman of CIE International Education Group denouncing the move as "vulgar".  

Golf has long been derided in China as the "rich man’s game".  But with two top universities announcing golf courses within a month of one another, you get the sense that "the rich man’s game" is about to reach its tipping point in China and go mainstream.  This in itself is hardly surprising.  Another China Daily report notes that over the past 4 days in Shanghai, 12,000 visitors to a luxury products show lavished half a billion yuan on "luxury" trinkets like Porches and diamonds. suggesting that there is a big market out there for a sport that is still very expensive to play here.

However, all this interest in golf means that tee times are going to get very crowded over the next few years.   With arable land at a premium, the government has already slapped very strict limits on the construction of new land- and water-gobbling golf courses, and crackdowns have left other existing courses in legal limbo. So be prepared for sky-high green fees….and watch out for those software engineers.

As of some time this afternoon, Wikipedia has been completely acessible in Beijing, the first time it’s been available in China in almost exactly  a year.  Commentors on the chinese-forums website have reported that they can access it. It is too early to tell whether this is a permanent arrangement or just a temporary leak in the firewall. 

It has, however, already been several hours since it came back online, and a quick scan finds that a number of  pages on some of the more sensitive issues are available. Intriguingly though, trying to access certain pages (e.g. those on events in 89) results in acccess to the entire site being denied.  This is similar to the block that occurs when users search for sensitive keywords on google.  Google immediately becomes off limits for that user.  Could it be that authorities have spent the last year sifting through and cataloguing the millions of entries on Wikipedia and have finally decided to allow access to the non-sensitive ones?

If I had a yuan for every time I’ve been asked by folks from home why, with 1.3 billion football-crazy people to choose from, China is apparently unable to round up 11 half-decent footballers to form a competent national team,  I’d be a very rich man.  Well, maybe not rich but I would, at least, be better off than most professional footballers in China, who according to Chinese football legend Hao Haidong are poorer than migrant workers.

In a TV interview yesterday, Hao claimed that non-payment of wages is rife in Chinese football and many professional footballers are in dire financial straits .  The beanpole striker’s comments drew criticism from some quarters, but shed light on the reasons for both the appaling standard of football in the domestic league and the national team’s embarrasing display against Singapore a few weeks back. 

The players aren’t being paid because the entire league is riddled with corruption, illegal betting and crooked refereeing. Gambling rings have destroyed competition and bled all enjoyment from the leagues.  In 2004, the Super League came close to meltdown, when even the players refused to continue the farce.  In October of that year, players from top clubs Beijing Hyundai, Dalian Shide and others, walked off in the middle of their games in protest at obviously biased refereeing decisions.  The players then went on strike, and it took an extraordinary climbdown by the CFA to bring them back to work, with the national governing body promising to open their books and cede some power to the players,

Little has really changed in the interim, though, and attendances keep dropping.  Fans, naturally, have voted with their feet, and sponsors have followed suit.  Last year the Super League’s main sponsor, Siemens, terminated its association with the event.  As a result, many clubs are just barely staying afloat. No sponsors and no fans means no money, and no wages for the poor stooges going through the motions on the field.  

The money problems extend right the way up the chain too.  An article on Sina.com last month (link in Chinese) investigated why a big-name coach still hasn’t been appointed to lead the national team, even though it’s been almost 5 months since the last coach stepped down and a number of high-profile candidates, like former England boss Howard Wilkinson, have registered their interest. The reason?   There’s no money.  The sponsors aren’t willing to spend the estimated 500,000 euros it would take to attract a top manager, and given the ptitful state of the domestic game, can you really blame them?

So now you know why Chinese football is so bad.

Spare a thought, though, for the players of 2004-05 champions Shenzhen Jianlibao.  Earlier this year they went to the labour court to  force their club to fork out almost 5 million yuan’s worth of unpaid wages.  It seems possible, however, that while they were waiting for their cash,  some of the players may have turned to some less-than-legal sources for fiduciary assistance, because, in the last year, two of the club’s first team have been attacked and savagely beaten on the streets of the city by "unidentified assailants".

China Daily reports  that the China Banking Regulatory Commission (CBRC) and the Ministry of Commerce are having second thoughts about the tough regulations they set for foreign banks entering the Chinese market. 

According to the terms of the country’s accession to the WTO, China is obliged to open the banking sector to foreign institutions by the end of this year.  But in June, the domestic regulators surprised everyone, none moreso than the foreign banks, by slapping a host of new limitations on foreign financial institutions entering China.  The proposal that caused most upset stipulated that foreign banks could only accept single local deposits of a minimum of a million yuan, which would in effect force them out of most of the market. 

Since then, the overseas banks have been kicking up an almighty ruckus and crying foul and it now appears that the Chinese authorities have been paying attention.  The China Daily article states that bickering between the CBRC - who are more interested in protecting the domestic players than welcoming the outside banks - and the Ministry of Commerce - who are concerned about WTO compliance - may see the idea shelved or changed.

For the reason why there has been such an outcry from the foreign players about this, see this story and this one.  China has the highest rate of personal savings in the world, estimated at almost 50% (compared with 10% in the USA).  Yet, surprisingly, it seems that even as Chinese people get richer, increased interest rates are encouraging them to save more rather than spend more.  China Daily reports on the results of a nationwide survey of 20,000 people, which found that the number of people who believe "saving is a better option than spending" has risen 2.2 percentage points in the last quarter alone. 

The market potential is simply enormous.  No wonder the bankers were so mad.  

Members of the International Monetary Fund today voted overwhelmingly to approve a controversial package of reforms that will give greater power and imporatance in the IMF to China and three other countries.  The changes will see China’s share of the votes in the IMF rise from the present 2.98% to 3.719%, with the shares of South Korea, Turkey and Mexico also rising by similarly small amounts.

Although the amounts seem insignificant, the IHT described the moves as "a swing in the global order" and  Henry M. Paulson Jr., US Treasury secretary was quoted as saying “It looks like a small step forward, but it’s a large step".  Not everyone was happy with the decision, though, with India dismissing as "flawed" the entire process of reform.

The Western powers, however, have agreed to support China’s expanding role in the hope that the increased power will force China to become more responsible in the way it gives handouts to other countries.   China’s influence as an international donor is growing, but in keeping with the stated dictums of its foriegn policy -  ‘A Peaceful Rise’ and ‘Non-interference’ - its donations are notably free of the ethical clauses that accompany Western contributions.  Such catch-free handouts are welcomed by certain states that have become pariahs in the west.  The list of countries that have benefitted from Chinese donations raises eyebrows: Zimbabwe, Sudan and Myanmar are just three of the countries depending on charity from Beijing to stay afloat.

On a related note, the military junta in Myanmar today expressly thanked China for its support in opposing a resolution in the  UN Security Council to formally list Myanmar on the council’s agenda.  The resolution was passed last Friday by 10 votes to 4.  The dissenters were China, Russia, Qatar and Congo.

Unsurprisingly, there are no official statistics available on patriotic and nationalist sentiment in China, but if there were they would make for interesting reading.

National spirit in China is not just that misty-eyed feeling one gets when the Irish rugby team beat England at Twickenham (or anywhere else for that matter).  With China on the up economically, but relations with Japan at an all-time low,  nationalism here much much more than that.   Almost every social and cultural activity is infused with nationalist spirit, from computer games to pop star fashions.  More than that, nationalism is a political weapon, a convenient plug for the gaping hole left by the demise of communism, and, as such, something the authorities are keen to foster.

So, despite the shortage of official stats, one would expect the level of national pride in China to be high, very high indeed.  Perhaps seeking to fill the statistical void and confirm this trend, someone at the popular 163.com website apparently decided to quantify national pride in China by finding out how many citizens would choose to be Chinese if they were born again.    The results, though, were  surprising, with more than 60% of the respondents indicating that they would not choose to be Chinese.

As soon as the authorities caught this faint whiff of a controversy (with its potential to spark debate on the taboo topic of Chinese national identity), the official clamdown, was swift, clean and thorough.  The South China Morning Post reports that two editors - Tang Yan and Liu Xianghui- from Netease, the company running the website that organised the survey, have been sacked and the poll and its results have been taken down. 

As reported by Danwei on Sept 11th, the survey asked respondents if they were to be reincarnated would they choose to be Chinese again.  The unexpected results, as noted by Danwei, were as follows:

38.1%: No, because Chinese people get no respect.
17.4%: No, because you can’t afford a house in China, and the good life is too far off.
0.4%: No, because you can’t see good cartoons in China.
0.7%: No, because you can’t make spoof videos in China.
7.8%: No, no reason.
6.3%: Yes, I want to be a descendant of the dragon.
1.7%: Yes, because China’s economy is developing and the future is bright.
6.7%: Yes, because China’s long history and vast culture fills me with pride.
2.7%: Yes, because I’m currently pretty happy, and I trust it will be the same in the future.
18.2%: Yes, because I love my homeland, no other reason.

These results were based on 10,234 responses.

"Raise a Corpse From the Dead" is one of the famous 36 Tricks, the military stratagems that have influenced generals and leaders in China since long before the Art of War.   This particular proverb’s rough meaning is that, when the time is right, one should resurrect some person, thing or idea long-abandoned or ignored and use it to one’s own advantage.

For a classic example of this idea in action, look no further than China’s reaction to Pope Bendict’s comments on Islam. Never ones to miss an opportunity to lay into the Taiwan-friendly Holy See (which is in keeping with another one of the 36 strategies: "Loot a burning house") Chinese authorities have stoked the pope’s troubles by ensuring that the voices of Chinese muslims are heard loud and clear amidst the international clamour. 

To do so, they have raised the corpse of Chen Guangyuan, head of the Islamic Association of China. Normally utterly anonymous, today he has been let off the leash so that he can have a go at the Pope and register the upset of China’s Islamic community.  The publication of his comments is surprising since religious leaders in China, even those like Mr Chen who are appointed by the Party, almost never make comments in public, particularly on matters of international politics.  But the leadership has apparently judged that in order to have a dig at the Vatican it is worth giving domestic religious figureheads like Mr. Chen the oxygen of publicity. 

"This has gravely hurt the feelings of the Muslims across the world, including those from China," Chen said, in a report published by Xinhua. "Both the Islamic Association of China and Chinese Muslim would here express their anger and condemnation over Benedict’s words.  We strongly request Pope Benedict XVI to immediately take back his words and apologize openly and in person." 

No doubt many of China’s Muslims were angry at the pope’s comments, but it is hard to take Mr Chen’s comments seriously considering that he apparently stays schtum on almost every other matter affecting his flock in China, and only appears on the scene at politically serendipitous occasions

A quick search for Chen Guangyuan’s name on the People’s Daily website reveals that the last time this particular corpse was exhumed was in June, when he was trotted out to refute American allegations of religious persecution in China.  "We feel cheated; we made a lot of effort to ensure the commission saw the true situation and we hoped they would tell the truth in their report" said Mr Chen at the time.

Almost 30 years to the day after his death, one has to wonder what the great helmsman would make of reports like this one in yesterday’s Guardian about China’s burgeoning polo scene.  Well, perhaps burgeoning is not quite the right word. What’s one step above hypothetical?

In fairness to Xia Yang, the man behind the polo club, he has organised an impressive line-up for his team.  The chairman of oil giant Sinopec, and the CEO of the company that built the rail line to Tibet are apparently two of the (however many people comprise a polo team/group/set/herd) who will be pulling on the red jerseys for a game/chukka/innings against Australia next month. 

Xia, though, is adamant that he and his club are not elitist.  "Polo is not about money, it is about being a gentleman," he says.  And being a gentleman evidently necessitates owning a horse and having enough free time to galavant around on it with billionaire tycoons.  But it’s not elitist.  Just to be clear on that. 

Xia also has plans for an official national team, and big ambitions for his outfit that now boasts only 20 members. "I really hope that one day I will have the opportunity to play against Prince Charles and the Sultan of Brunei." 

But, remember, it’s not elitist. 

On a similar vein, China Daily today carries an AFP report on the nascent movement to popularise cricket in China.  The Asian Cricket Council evidently sees China as the key market for the development of cricket. 

"Once China comes on board in a significant manner, then cricket will truly be a global game. Chinas presence will encourage other countries to try harder to make an impact," said Asian Cricket Council chief executive Syed Ashraful Huq.  Unfortunately, however, one gets a sinking feeling from this article that the ACC is betting on success based on the same equation that has burned so many before. To whit:

(spalshing oodles of cash on promoting something in a country where no-one has ever heard of it)

X

(1.3 billion would-be consumers/users/players of the aforementioned thing)

=  $$$$$$$$$

"As soon as China breaks through, I foresee the total global revenues for cricket increasing by up to 30 to 40 percent," said Mr. Huq.

Anyway, all good wholesome fun, I’m sure.  But those who can’t afford a thoroughbred, or don’t have a cricket oval marked out in their back gardens, needn’t fret.  This week there’s also good news for the financially embarrased: Tesco is bringing dirt cheap ready meals to China.  The FT revealed yesterday that the supermarket giant will begin selling Tesco-branded valuepack products through its Chinese joint venture, Hymall.  It will be introducing up to 500 own-brand products, including readymeals and instant noodles.

Wen Jiabao, friend of the foreign media? So says China Daily, reporting on a speech Wen gave in London yesterday in which he "stressed that China would stick to the policy of opening-up to the outside world".  Wen apparently assured his audience at the China-Britain Business Council that the state would protect the rights of foreign media in order to "assure the smooth flow of the economic and financial information".  There was a sting in the tail, though, as he intimated that this protection would be available only to those who play by the Chinese government’s rules.  "We will work to ensure that financial and economic information will flow uninterrupted. We trust that the foreign media will … observe Chinese laws and regulations," he is reported to have said.

More of the same at the Foreign Ministry yesterday, too, where officials are putting on their friendly faces in an effort to dampen talk of a media clampdown in advance of the 2008 Games.   "China will continue to improve its work and provide more service, convenience and help to foreign media and journalists," said spokesman Qin Gang.  But before you grab your dictaphone and rush off to interview that political dissident under house arrest in Tibet, Mr. Qin also reminds you that "China also hopes foreign media and journalists can observe the laws and regulations of their resident country".